Having a Second Child Becoming a Parent Again
Your first child made you pretty happy, so volition having another actually top things off? I frequently wonder this myself. Should I have a 2d child?
Luckily, research shows how our lives change with another baby. Read the essential guide to how another baby affects your happiness, meaning in life, spousal relationship, family life, former historic period, health, and spending.
See also The Only Kid: Everything You Demand to Know, Answered by Enquiry
Women are happiest with ane child
It appears that having ane child makes women happiest. At a minimum, having one kid makes women happier than no children at all. Only "onlies" may be the sweet spot.
One study looked at identical twins anile 25-45. By comparing twins, researchers could ignore genetic causes for having fewer children or beingness depressed. They constitute that a woman's first kid increased her happiness. But each boosted kid negatively effected her well-being.
Could it be that having an just child gives us the wonder of parenthood that we really enjoy, while keeping the hard work and stress to a minimum?
Some other study looked at how a adult female's personality afflicted her happiness with more children. Exercise "traditional" women gain more happiness from having two children than "modern" women? Information technology seems they practise not. One child produced the near happiness in these women, too, regardless of their personality blazon. A 2nd infant reduced well-existence scores for all women.
Balancing the needs of multiple kids is stressful no matter what your expectations are. That said, women often have on more parenting responsibilities. So, could having another baby make a man happier?
Men also benefit from i kid versus ii
Men, too, see an increase in happiness with their commencement child. Fathers of one child described higher life satisfaction than those without any children. However, the second child only increased the happiness of "traditional" men. Men labeled "modern" received no benefit.
Perhaps "modernistic" men take on more diapers and dishes with the birth of another child? Or, maybe traditional men just get more than pleasure out of parenting.
On the other mitt, the scientists researching identical twins looked at fathers, too. They found that having children did non impact their happiness at all. Life satisfaction remained stable, regardless of how many kids they had. When it came to family life, only union truly increased men's well-being.
It may be that children have a smaller issue on the happiness of men versus women. If so, women may take more to gain or lose emotionally from choosing to have another baby.
Likewise, another study looked at factors like age and marital status. They found that one or two children made no departure to happiness, for men or women. However, this written report constitute that three or more children negatively afflicted well-being.
But at that place is more to life than but happiness. Often, the moments we truly savor are stressful. Remember of solving a tough problem, competing in an result, or hey, raising that first child. Sometimes stress seems to add more significant to one'due south life. Could another child do the aforementioned?
A second baby does have some benefits
Parents relish more meaning in their lives than non-parents. Researchers compared both life-satisfaction and meaning in adults. They establish that having children living at dwelling house reduced a person'southward well-beingness. Simply at the aforementioned time, it increased their sense of meaning. Afterward children grew up and moved out, parents enjoyed higher levels of both well-being and meaning compared to people who never had children.
This study didn't compare ane versus two children, but information technology is possible that having another kid could further increment the meaning in ane's life.
Such may exist the case in a study from Russia that goes confronting what all the previous research has found. Here, researchers tracked people over 20 years and found that parents were actually happier after the birth of their second baby. With their first child, life satisfaction dipped for several years, then increased to levels college than earlier. Just a second kid steadily increased happiness. Life satisfaction never dipped after the second birth, and happiness continued to increase as they grew upward.
Perchance, life satisfaction is more closely related to feelings of meaning in Russia. Or, mayhap family life is supported more than in Russia than in other groups studied.
Simply this wasn't the merely written report that constitute having more than than only kid benefited well-being.
Union makes it more than fun to have a 2nd child
Certainly, married people are more likely than singles to gain happiness from having another child. When a report in the UK divided people past marital status, the life satisfaction of married people increased with each additional kid. However, unmarried folks saw their happiness reject with each child.
Other studies contest this finding. In the twin and "traditional" parent studies, married people were less happy with two or more children, with the exception of traditional men. A third report found no effect of one or ii kids in married parents only three or more children reduced happiness. But surely, a supportive spouse makes raising another kid much easier.
Ane surprising finding: in married women (but not in single women), a second child reduces the adventure of suicide. A tertiary or fourth child reduces the risk even further. Maybe, despite any increase in stress level, having a larger family strengthens your sense of purpose and resolve.
If beingness married is critical to being happy raising another kid, what does having second child practise to one'due south marriage?
Another baby takes a toll on your marriage
Lamentable news: parents report less satisfaction in their marriages than non-parents. And marital satisfaction decreases with every boosted child. The effect is strongest for mothers of infants, simply is found across all ages and in both men and women.
Multiple studies indistinguishable this negative effect. Parents of preschoolers written report the lowest levels of satisfaction with their partners.
1 study found that children reduce time spent on "companionate activities." With each child, parents spent less quality time with one another. In that study, it was the low levels of couple time rather than the kids that truly hurt the wedlock.
So, preserving couple time every mean solar day to connect and maintaining a engagement dark may prevent the stress a second child puts on your union.
That said, having another kid puts stress on the entire family unit.
How a second child affects family life
Large families seem to bring more stress for everyone. Two studies looked at the dynamics of family unit life for unlike sized families. They found that with an increasing number of children came more fighting between family members and more feelings of negativity nigh each other. More children also brought more stress to each family member, fifty-fifty after controlling for economic status.
Despite the stress, these large families may gloat more pregnant in their lives. But certain people may be meliorate equipped to handle the stress of a big family.
One report looked at married folks who were currently employed and working on masters degrees. This study represented people with total plates. In this group, having additional children led to lower satisfaction with family life. It could be that these parents had so much on their plate that they couldn't handle the stress of another child.
But information technology would be short sighted to only consider the immediate stress of more children in the business firm. Perhaps there is a long term happiness gain once children are grown up and living on their own.
Are we happier once our children are grown?
There are studies from Japan, Korea, and Ethiopia finding more children increases happiness in one-time age. In Korea, five kids raised life satisfaction more than two kids for elders, and two kids beat out none. In Federal democratic republic of ethiopia, older men benefitted the most from a large number of children. Merely older women benefitted in Nihon.
But what would happen if these studies controlled for socioeconomic condition? Mayhap in countries with potent retirement programs, where people didn't accept to rely on their kids for support, the link betwixt children and happiness might dissolve. One study did simply that.
Researchers looked at surveys from 86 countries. When it came to children and happiness, the tables turned at age twoscore. Although each boosted child decreased happiness in parents nether xl, having more children actually increased happiness in older folks. Elderly people who lacked authorities retirement programs benefitted the nearly from having larger families. On the other hand, immature parents benefitted from living in countries with regime support for families.
Does financial security brand a 2nd child more fun?
Denmark has i of the strongest social condom nets in the earth. So, looking at the life satisfaction of parents here may all-time represent how children issue happiness when coin is not an issue.
The twin study from Denmark found that the number of children significantly affected women aged 25-45. In this age range, each child beyond the first decreased life satisfaction. Just once the kids moved out? Children did non effect happiness at all in people aged fifty-lxx. Then, simply marital status became relevant.
Besides, a study from America looked at people 45 and over, comparing life satisfaction co-ordinate to 22 different factors, like spousal relationship, age, and personal wealth. They constitute that children had no begetting on a person's happiness. Instead, socioeconomic status, the quality of health, and how often a person got together with friends became critical. Further, researchers compared fourth dimension with family unit to time with friends. Friends were the pregnant gene in happiness.
And so, information technology may be that if you have a strong retirement programme, children will take the biggest influence on your life satisfaction while they are living at abode. And even if you can beget to care for multiple children, y'all withal may not be happier raising them.
But how much coin does it take to afford having another child?
How much does having a 2nd child price?
In America, a second kid costs about $x,230 per year. This is the average for married couples, and is in addition to the cost of the first child. This does not include higher savings, and was taken from a 2013 analysis performed by the USDA.
According to inquiry, married couples spend about 26% percent of their income on simply children. The toll rises to 39% of income, on average, for 2 children. Parents spent most of this coin on housing, food, childcare and education.
Consider that your current home may already accommodate having ii children. One parent may already be at home and you don't plan to pay for childcare or individual schoolhouse. In this case, you may not end up spending every bit much on some other child.
One surprising savings may come up from health care. It turns out that your wellness actually benefits from having a 2nd kid.
Having two children is good for your health
Having two children reduces mortality risk. Three unlike studies looked at thousands of older adults and found the same matter: 2 kids was the sweet spot for health. The risk of an early death increases by 18% for parents of an merely child. As well, the risk is higher for parents of three or more kids. Scientists believe the lifestyle of parents with two kids somehow helps them live longer.
However, there is one health benefit of less children: lower BMI. Fifty-fifty afterward accounting for multiple factors, each additional child increases a woman'southward risk of obesity by 7%. A man's risk of obesity increases iv% with every child.
Having some other child may reduce the time one can devote to cooking healthy meals or exercise. Merely maybe having a 2d child encourages us to get up and motion more during the day, or to be more agile in our older years.
Should you have a second kid?
Obviously, the choice affects more than just you or your partner. Deciding to have a 2nd child will dramatically change the life of your first. I'm and so curious to learn the effects of being an only kid, and my next article will embrace that.
Run across as well The Only Child: Everything You lot Need to Know, Answered by Inquiry
And of grade, at that place are still other things to consider. Having another baby diverts fourth dimension from other life goals. Each kid adds to the increasing burden humans place on our surround. Personally, I worry nigh the regret I may feel once I am besides quondam to change my determination.
All things considered, I accept all the same to hear one parent say they regret having a second child.
How would a 2d child bear on your life? Does the research modify your opinion on having an just kid by selection? I'd love to hear about your feelings in the comments.
Sources:
Having a second child makes a woman less satisfied; only some types of men benefit
Having a 2d child decreases happiness in women, has no issue on men
Having more children increases family stress
Family size has no effect on life satisfaction after controlling for other factors
Parents accept less well-beingness but more life-meaning
Each child reduces marital satisfaction
In Korea, older adults with more kids enjoy a higher quality of life
Having another child increases risk of obesity by 7% in women, iv% in men
Cardiovascular disease take chances is lowest for those with two children
Mortality risk is lowest for mothers of 2 to 4 children
Having iii or more children reduces well-being
In Russian federation, life satisfaction increases after second nascency
More than children reduces family satisfaction
Authorities retirement programs reduce the effect of children on happiness
Expenditures on Children by Families, 2013, USDA
Source: https://researchaddict.com/second-child/
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